TREEHOUSE & Post Millennium Parables Presents
Sananda’s New Aesop’s Fables:
THE WRITINGS OF CHAIRMAN MOO*
Edited by W. Marmoset Yarn
It had amounted to a resourceful summer for W.Marmoset Yarn.
He had written songs for THE SECOND GUESSERS, for their project,
‘Look Out, The 3rd Guessers Are Here’.
One of his compositions for the Bluegrass/Funk group had been played
All over the radio and was called ‘The Spy Who Came In From The Damp (and the Humidity)’
And featured verses such as:
‘Standing in your doorway
I may as well move to Norway
Or I could just come in and throw it
Your way, unless you want me
To go away and I go away to Goa,
India, ‘cause I’m into ‘ya, that’s
Why I call you Cynthia’.
He had also written a song titled the ‘SEA HORSE WHISPERER’
Which took a different approach with the lyrics, which were just
Underwater gurgles. No words, just the sound of a guy trying to talk to a sea horse
Quietly while submerged in a deep coral reef, breaking bubbles & releasing gasses.
The children got a big kick out of it.
As did the elders.
And this from ‘ELIZABETHAN BLUES’
My kingdom for a horse
My kingdom for a horse
It ended in divorce
Cut down by switching
& bitter at not having
gone to school
nor were they measured
by the golden rule
but by a callous source.
Yet he’d also made the controversial declaration during an interview that to his knowledge
“We Thank God, but the fish thank Cod.”
For Marmoset, Controversy stimulated conversation, which was really all that nattered to him.
People’s minds being as they are, they will settle as they would.
He would also find the time to publish his latest book, an insightful study delving into the lives of
Laboratory rodents in Holland used for marijuana potency testing; ‘HAMSTERDAM’.
And he would find cause to use one of his pen names, ‘Medieval Knieval’ to write a scathing
Essay on the current political state, edited as, ‘The Hero With A Thousand Excuses’.
Edited by ‘ED MEYERS’ himself!
It was true that to his mouth were a silver spoon born & tarnished, but to compensate, he ate with tuning forks, but especially when he ate tuna salad (or pork).
And thus was he never at odds with his meal, being so attuned. And he burned his calories by thinking a lot, as he found WALKING TOO PEDESTRIAN.
And he refused to “Run With The Wolves” as he was more than certain that to the sensible among the few, wolves were something you ran FROM, and never With (What, are we still primates?).
Any monkey might learn to play BACH’S ‘WELL TEMPERED PIANO’ but not just any monkey can
And the small sample size of monkeys who HAVE attempted to write it, we have successfully isolated
From us, and removed to remote islands.
After all, this was the man who’d written ‘Of James Bondage’, ‘The Major’s Pledge (and Minor Wedgie)’, ‘A Bridge Too Far (And A Little Too Crooked & Over Budget)’, ‘The Rented Whale (A Seaman’s Pleasure)’, ‘The Yeti Always Keep You Waiting (& Yet, I Also Keep)’ ‘The Art Of Crying’, ‘If This Tree Shakes, It’s Not My Wind That Breaks’
& other seminal scribbling.
And he were the proud editor of the ‘LIBRERIA DYSLEXIA’ series, and had been lauded for the sensitivity of his translation work on Charles Dickens’
‘A Sale Of Two Titties’.
Now a coming feature film!
He would continue his research work for a pet project he was involved in. It was an idea for a
‘Hologram In A Can’. You just popped open the top, and a city park or country forest would
Whisk you away to rushing waters and gurgling brooks.
And all for the price of a dream,
Yet less than the price of a can of Spam
(Whose future linguist he thinks he am).
Artifacts & Figurines:
Left To Its Own Devices, Time Writes Itself.
To the Marmoset, ‘KARMALOGIC’ was a simple formula.
Time In Is Time Gained.
Time Lost Is Time Forgotten.
We Inherit The Culture We Promote.
What We Seed & Feed, We Breed.
When Evolution Is Promoted, Evolution Is Gained.
What We Raise, We Receive.
Our Expression Mirrors Our Reflection.
The Mind That You Are Looking For Is Not Yours
(And Never Will Be).
BREATHING IS FUNDAMENTAL.
The Marmoset were well aware that one needn’t chain a people physically.
One only needed to chain their image.
We are suspended, enchanted & enslaved by our reflection in the waters.
Drums have FLOOR TOMS & You Are Either
“Floor Toms Or Against Toms”.
‘Tom Flores’ says:
Change Your Mind & the View Around it Changes too.
Marmoset could see the public shift towards a perception of Morality
According To ‘As It Trends’. And the perpetual swing between the abysses
Harboring A SCHOOL OF FISH darting through kelp,
Crying out for help.
He recalled with brevity of mirth,
The time he witnessed a webcam mistress orgasming and crying out
“OMG, I’M TRENDING”!!!
While moving the Earth,
With limbs bending.
And he trusted what Shakespeare suggested:
ALL’S WELL THAT TRENDS WELL’
(Trusted since birth, for what it’s worth
in the world being comprehended).
To ‘Goldie’, it seemed a worthless and lost cause.
Being A Fish Sucked. Being a fish in a school of fish
Sucked even more. There was literally NO ESCAPE!
He had over the many months attempted several
Breakaway moves, some of his very best, only to find
That, true to the deeply annoying nature of schools of fish,
When he went one way, THEY went that way, and when
He ZIGGED, they NEVER ZAGGED, he couldn’t shake them
Without shaking himself up.
He would wait until they were asleep, and quietly
Move out, only to look back and verify the suspicion
That they were sleep swimming right behind him. It wasn’t that
He hated them or anything, It Was Just Time To Leave School,
Which he found Too Conservative for his Nature.
He was ‘Brimming
With Confidence’ at his chances in the open waters. Yet so far
To no real avail. He would sometimes race them until they were
Exhausted and disoriented, though by that time ‘Goldie’ himself
Then felt as were he caught on a hook with bated breath.
Avoiding nets were of enough concern.
AND THEN IN A DREAM CAME A FLASH OF INSPIRATION.
HE WOULD MOUNT HIS ESCAPE BY PLAYING DEAD!!!
He would undertake the ‘Goldfish In A Bowl’ approach and Float
His way to freedom, Belly up style. “WOW, YEAH THAT’LL WORK”!
And thus hopefully ending his affiliation with his school.
Goldie Was Successful.
He feigned death and floated listlessly to the top of the briny surf
Washed upon by foam. And as he took a clear breath of open sea air,
he looked to see that he had inspired the rest of his school to make the same
attempt, all of them there, yet, with one saying to him:
“That was something different! And now what?”
At some point, Goldie smashed his head against a rock and killed himself.
As did several other fish.
The Zen Conundrum?
Is It Easier To Scale A Fish or A Ladder?
And if the Scales of Justice are Blind, doesn’t that give Justice a Handicap?
The performers who did not promote the ZUGEBRIAN TIME LORDS’ Way Of Life
Had their performing licenses revoked, which were already difficult to obtain,
And as easy to lose as gloves.
In order to receive official permission to perform, a test were given similar to that of
Our own ‘Rorschach Test’. You were shown visuals and asked what you saw. And if
By chance your vision failed to match theirs, you failed the test. If you didn’t see what they
Thought you should see, then you couldn’t see very well and were cast aside for the next
Eager participant in the escapades who saw what needed to be seen.
Your voice could be extracted from the central database and ASSIGNED TO ANOTHER SINGER. Mixed in to blend with their own computer assisted sound, OR taken outright and credit for it granted to another name.
Voices without A Native Tongue Are also Voices without Restriction.
Then again, there was always the option hovering over the discontent that the Time Lords could choose
To make an example of a dissenting performer and cash out on their value on the BLACK MARKET DEATH LOTTERY. Once having signed on with the ZUGEBRIANS, your value was sure to be monetized & achieved, whatever the state it took to deliver you therein.
One way or another, once you were worth money, you were ALWAYS worth money, dead or alive.
After all, the Time Lords were GENETIC TRADERS. They could manufacture Gold, Diamonds.
They could manufacture bodies & souls. What they couldn’t create, despite their technological
Zeal, was genetics, the library of time and its vocabulary enriched by things established and seen, and
Truncated into stacks of reason & rage.
Once You Step On The Scales Of Justice, You Can’t Step Off Again.
NO BACKWASH, NO BACKLASH
(Says the Genie in the Bottle).
The Zugebrian Time Lords were No Nonsense Colonizers. The nickname for them was the
‘SO BE IT’ UNION. Because as they wanted things to be, that way were it done, So Be It.
Denizens of Inhabited Realms were even obliged to pay a WEATHER TAX to promote
Good weather. Failure To Comply resulted in Horribly Unpredictable Weather (Called by the locals, the ‘CLUSTERFUZZ’ ) and the Loss of What Few, Cursory Crops were allowed to be grown by the people themselves, though not many were allowed,
Self Sufficiency Being Seen as Political Rebellion.
These Various Citizens were Detained by the ZTL for Inspiring Questions. Everyone was meant to be happy simply by being told that they were, & accepting it. And all are connected in working against the ‘CONFUSIONISTAS’ for the preservation of the ZOOATHALON.
They were labeled the COUNCIL OF DIMINISHED FIGUREHEADS and are comprised of:
Vinnie Qua, Polly Mathis, Horace Tuwater, Nixon Cutts, Nick Sanbruzes, Kitty Hawkins,
Gil O’Tine, Rock Wyler, Reggie Menthead, Sarah P. Ticious, Holly Costa, Wendy Vento,
Blue Byum, Stella Maris-Rogers, Anita Hugg, Leif Blowers, Mez Morizor, Dick Wickhams,
Justin Knother, Diz Astor, Benny Factor, Jus Beadem, Connie Lindquist, Dr. John Dice,
X.N. Bacon, Dr. Macon Love, Greg O’Ryan & Julie Ann Calendar, Mr. & Mississippi,
Horst U. Rodin-On, F. Schufitz-Werrit, R.A.B.N. Knight-Hood, Anton M., ‘Synon’ M.,
O.P.Yates, Justin Huff, R. Peggio, Al B. Cocca, Marion Kind, Carmen Dioxide, Reese Otto,
Daisy Cheney, and LORD GODFRY HELPUS & LADY SAMANTHA WITHUM.
And as always, No Zugebrian List was complete which didn’t Bear The Names, VICTOR
SPOILS & LUTHER MEANS. Which sweated neither much, being as both were, at once within
The Game & Totally Untouched By It.
There was No Surface Scratched that they couldn’t Go Beyond.
And as such they represented the Twin Faces of the
‘SCHAMA PASCHAL’ :
THE FACE WHICH MUST BE WORN BY TIME AS IT TURNS TO
The Role Throughout Time of the ‘Schama Paschal’ ( sha-ma pa- SHAWL) predates our knowledge of time as both Conceptual Duality Interface Point and the understanding of it as an actual manifestation of a Physical Interdimensional state of Mass Consciousness.
And the preeminent role of the ‘Schama Paschal’ is to Maintain Constant Vigilance against the Wandering Vortex that is the ‘AZU MEDUZA’. Come anywhere near the ‘Azu Meduza’,
And you are said to be ‘ROLLING WITH LUCIFER’S DICE’.
The Negative Influence of the ‘Azu Meduza’ could induce a State of Trans-Personal Consciousness called
‘RECOGNITION BY MORTON’, a Dissociative Trance State whereby ‘Plausible Reality’ becomes ‘Suspended Possibility’ through the Undulating Prism of the ‘Fractal Reasoning Process’.
It is Used to Distract & Unnerve.
Things like ‘MUSHROOMS FOR RENT’ begin
To make sense, as does ‘A Fungus That Fits The Mold’.
And EXCLAMATION POINTS can be used as trigger points, their use therefore strictly monitored (!).
But far worse, the AZU MEDUZA was known to attract ROGUE ASTEROIDS
And the pirates who control them.
Mass Consciousness or Massachusetts?
They are both states, one no more accessible than the other.
And each with their taxes.
Of Course he was not Yet Fully Vetted nor Experienced Enough to be Considered A ‘Count’.
Nor was he Ready for the Responsibility, though surely it had been time to Pull Him off of
The Playground Away from the Rest of the Kids.
Inhabiting a space between worlds, neither in the swim, nor landlocked, he chose a different
Way of life and having Forfeited his Inheritance, he would thereafter
Be referred to as ‘DISCOUNT DRACULA’.
He could be assumed an
‘IDEALIST’ as much as he could be called a ‘RATIONALIST’.
Idealists dream things, & rationalists get things done.
He came from a long line of genetic traders.
His interest in blood kept him involved in the chain and circle of life.
He devoted his time to the PRESERVATION OF SPECIES.
Things do turn, as does now this story…
LORD GODFRY HELPUS & LADY SAMANTHA WITHUM
Were more than enamored of the idea of funding a
HIGHER SCHOOL OF FISH.
An Aquatic University devoted to the Intellectual Aspirations
Of our noble sea creatures
AND as always and ever TO PROTECT AND MAINTAIN THE SQUID PRO QUO.
Even sign language classes for the hard of Herring, medical courses for Sturgeon
& music training for Tuna fish & Bass.
Yet, However the zeal with which TURBOTS are taught to Design Diesel Engines,
There Is Still the Immutable Fact that;
WHERE THE FISH ARE, THE NETS ARE.
And Once having Got Wind of his Ambition, the system took their cue from
Lord Helpus and Placed their Nets in the Same Area where he had Placed his
Dream. The More Interest he got from the Fish, the More Fish were caught by the
Nets, situated to take Advantage of his and Lady Samantha Withum’s generosity
Of spirit & prime location.
One man’s misfortune being another one’s salvation.
The Wheels Of Life Turn, But Before They Turn it might be best to Pickle Them First.
BE WARNED THAT THIS OCTOPUS IS FULLY ARMED!
Only once Oliver was rid of his final oxen were he able to finally post a sign on his ranch proclaiming
‘OLLIE, OLLIE: OXEN FREE!’
THE 7 ARMED OCTOPUS found it deeply ironic that the cops were describing him as
‘FULLY ARMED & DANGEROUS’
Yes, he was full of rage, he was 7/8ths of an Octopus, christened at birth ‘Otto’ to boot,
But if he were fully armed,
He wouldn’t be in the predicament
He found himself in, trying to Mussel in on the Coral Reefer market.
7 might be a Lucky Number for some, though clearly Not for All.
IT IS BETTER TO SMOKE FISH, Because You Never Know How Drunk they are,
Until It Is Too Late.
LADY SAMANTHA WITHUM
Was pleased with her work with her GIRAFFES.
She and Lord Godfry Helpus had taken two from the wilds of Tasmania and turned them into
TAG TEAM WHISTLERS.
This after she had designed a line of TURTLENECKS FOR GIRAFFES,
A success, though she Preferred the Time she Spent Training her two Lusty throated Pets in the Long Lost Art of Tag Team Whistling.
One Giraffe, Center Ring, would Begin Whistling A Tune, often a Waltz, and Before Running out of Breath
The Other giraffe would come and begin whistling the Next Part, each one’s part Getting Longer as They Took Their Turn.
Lady Samantha had already tried her considerable if tentative luck with BADGERS, but they spent too much time berating one another.
She cared less about going with the flow than following the flora & the fauna.
And the graceful lady would also agree with Confucius, were he as smart as she was, that:
THE BEST TIME TO QUIT DOING SOMETHING IS WHEN YOU HAVE RUN OUT OF IT.
Because For As Long as you Have it, You Need it.
THE ANNUAL SNAIL MARATHON
Is Being Canceled This Year due to Organizers not having Enough Time to rearrange the Travel
Schedules of Some of the Celebrity Snails, Sponsors and Endorsees.
Problem was that Last Year’s Marathon was given only 2 weeks, organizers not having realized
That it also takes the participants another 2 Weeks to Get Back Home.
It was also felt that Due to the Financial Crisis, business this year might be ‘SLUGGISH’.
There were also Several Bitter Protests that the Event, in an attempt to Motivate The Racers, was going to be moved to FRANCE and renamed the ‘Escargot Invitational’.
It Is Better To Be Eaten Than to be Lost Up A Frenchman’s Nose.
Never Be Lost Up Anyone’s Nose, you don’t belong there.
Takes his family off the ranch every late summer
And goes on a cross-country road trip
In their Recreational Vehicle.
And they don’t come back
Until the sun is orange and slanted in the sky
& ANY recipe with cranberry sauce in it,
Or stuffing has been
Put to seasonal rest.
Salivated at the Chance to finally have the Opportunity to meet one of his Idols,
Even though the Dog, ‘Sallie’ knew that the cat was
WANTED: DEAD OR ALIVE.
But this were no mere Thought Experiment, this
Was a Moment to Savor, and he listened as the Famous Cat explained patiently the laws of
QUANTUM MECHANICS. Sallie panted with pleasure as the Existential Feline
Purred out his heart. It didn’t really matter much to Sallie that he Knew or Understood
Little of what was being presented, but figured that he would be Given Credit for Intelligence
He did not possess, as long as he Nodded and Didn’t Chase the Cat Around the Room.
Sometimes, while the cat was explaining, It Would Come Back to Life Again, demonstrating
But the cat was also kind of scary with his knowledge of reality collapsing into various
Possibilities. Plus, ‘Dude Looked Like A Lady’, and kept pawing at some yarn that Sallie
Could never see yet still kept spinning. And he seemed to have an issue with ‘Tourrettes’.
Then again, how can you not be Bipolar being assumed both dead and alive?
If any trouble started and he had to defend his ground, or if matters came down to
‘Competing Hypothesis’ PAVLOV’S DOG knew that he
Could always cut SCHRÖDINGER’S CAT’S Whiskers with OCCAM’S RAZOR.
Shave him a bit, and wake his ass up, just to keep it real.
Sometimes, REALITIES COLLAPSE SO THAT DREAMS MIGHT BEGIN.
A TRUE PARADOX
Stricken with question marks, our duck friend asks himself, as it pertained to him and his other duck friend, “ AT WHAT POINT DOES A PAIR OF DUCKS BECOME A PARADOX, AND DO THEY HAVE TO BE SEEN, and if NOT seen, then can the paradox be said to be just a pair of ducks, and where is the line in between?”
And thus was he Struck
Though these Ducks
Were not for Pate.
Were more for Latte
& A Wooly
Pair of Socks,
Both having studied Karate
& Broken Several Rocks.
A PAIR OF BOXERS: DO YOU WEAR THEM OR DO THEY PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE?
HORACE TUWATER RECOLLECTIONS:
Leading a horse to water is made easier by First Filling the Trough with BEER.
Horses Love Beer! (A fact concealed in a conspiracy by the beer companies).
After the horse begins to think it is Liquid Hops it is being led to, It Will Go Quite
Willingly. Horses Are Smart, but they Are Also Naïve.
& After the beer has been replaced by water, his
Dreams Will Not Have Been Replaced, nor his Inner thirst.
Leading A Horse to Water is Easy. But Getting Them to Pay for the Drinks is what separates the Men from the Boys. Very often they will claim that they left their wallet back in the barn.
CAUTION: NEVER LEAD A HORSE TO WATER DRESSED AS A CLOWN.
Clowns Scare Horses, Even Clowns with Apples.
A Short Poem by REID MOORE BUXTEHUDE
My name is Reid Moore Buxtehude
I’d Sell my Name Out if I Could of
If the feigns of Regret, Revenge has had Enough of.
They call me Reid Moore Buxtehude
I was more legible than my Babysitter
Swimming through literature that Parches & Crumbles
Each Page After the Other.
Another short poem by Reid Moore Buxtehude
Having Once Entertained W.Marmoset Yarn
Who loves Spinning Fables from the Hay
of Savage Barns
While Pouring Drinks from Non Sequiters
Are Too Frosted To Carry on,
Like the Glaciers of Ecuador.
(While Aunt Gemma & her Allergies
On the Daybed Snored,
And the Overhead fan was Blowing).
Each Man is his Own Worst Pawn,
Were his Ideas Not Left
To Spawn & Farm,
A portion of his salary &
Convergence of the Passes
That the Mountain’s Base in Built Upon,
If Only for the Masses.
Trudging through the Moors Past Harm,
Like Water through Molasses.
And More So for their Hecklers & Rivals,
And their Brutal Charm
Though less Reckless are the Classes
Shouting, Quickened By Alarm,
Whom Others Might Libel,
Grounded in the Many Facets
That the Pressures Yield,
Grading Out the Feckless
Or circumventing their own Survival
& Short-Circuiting their Appeal.
WHERE IS NOAH & THE RAINBOW SIGN?
Nothing Kills Us Like the Cultures We Leave Behind.
AFTER MY ACCIDENT
I Went From Being
A Dancer To A Vegetable.
But in my imagination, I came to be known as:
& Danced My Life Away,
Step By Step!
The ‘Aubergine’ Kelly Poem:
‘Endings Obscure Beginnings’.
& The best time to Lose your Hair
Is when the Herd is Thinning
While you Fatten up your Heirs.
Earls will Always Draw their Pearls
And Dukes their fisticuffs.
And Whores, like Senators,
Will always Scream when
They’ve had enough.
For Once When I Was Lost
I fell in love with Robert Frost.
When Persephone Purses her Lips
I check my hips & banish to
The Underbelly what Doesn’t Fit.
Imagination Never Quits
Nor does it ever tarry.
I saw the Ferryman Bribed Once
Just to Sink the Ferry.
My side still splits &
There’s Always Blood where
The cherries leave their pits.
Sometimes We Put the Sex
Beyond the Terms we want to Marry.
No more twists, you get the gist
Sometimes the Finger
Sometimes the Wrist &
Sometimes you get the Roast,
Though Not the Cut You Want the Most.
Humping the air like a Vertical plane
Ginger Rogers & Fred Asterisk*
Like a Codger Who is Crazy Grinning
With Golden Teeth he likes to pawn
With a Silver Plated Fist that spins
When circumstances are less than Winning
And only Pride Sustains, gripped
Like a Dodger;
By Barbed Wire Curls Eclipsed
To Lessen Further risk.
To Elevate the Snowcaps of
What Once was Stationary,
Above the Fray.
Salute What is Ordinary!
ANY IDIOT CAN BE A VISIONARY,
The Truth Does Not delay:
Because What Will Occur Tomorrow
Has Already Happened today.
JUST PAY ATTENTION!
(Wouldn’t you say)?
And then Revel in your Gains
There are Urchins in the sea
More worth their Salt than any Stains!
As Memory turns to mist,
And motion turns into Mountains,
& the Fossils are the
Coffins of Our Remains
& The Brains
That Flow from Future Fountains
As the landscape changes.
For ‘Aubergine’ Kelly the question is:
Which Came First, the Chicken Parmesan or the Eggplant?
W. Marmoset Yarn will be writing songs for the upcoming EAST CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM project.
The title is a long one and is said to be:
‘DON’T WAIT FOR A GOLDEN AGE Because It Doesn’t Get Any More Golden Than It Is Now.
(And the Longer you wait for Gold, the more you inherit Silver)’.
These Morals brought to you by FRANCIS COPPOLA ZINFANDEL.
‘You Don’t Have To Be An Infidel
To Enjoy A Francis Coppola Zinfandel!’
HAPPY NEW YEAR & THANK YOU VERY MUCH,
I LOVE YOU and am grateful for your kind attention & support!
SANANDA MAITREYA MILANO ITALIA 2015.
COPYRIGHT SANANDA FRANCESCO MAITREYA
MILANO January 1st, 2015
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
INTELLECTUAL COPYRIGHT PROTECTED
* HOW NOW BROWN COW, HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW? CIAO!
& Don't take any wooden nickels unless you plan to float your currency on the market!